office hours: round 1.

[foo_bar]

office hours daily. i'm here to help... i think.

(screened PCs with han)

Comments

[preconstruction]

I could tell it was a well-written query, but that it wasn't working.

[ but it's interesting all the same what he says about megumi. ]

[foo_bar]

[he seems... pleased with that answer.]

Okay.

That's... probably a good thing, honestly.

I like you, Connor, and I think you're the only one here who would have a chance of deciphering it.

[preconstruction]

That's very cryptic.

[ which, han undoubtedly knows, but given that connor figures he won't get much more of an answer. ]

But I'd like to help you, if I can.

[foo_bar]

I mean. Realistically, you have to be calculating how much you can trust me given everything else that's going on. Everyone is.

[it's extremely cryptic, and it's like Han's on the tip of saying something more, but he's weighing his consequences]

I'll try to give you a reason for it, but it's going to look... not great for awhile there, honestly.

[preconstruction]

True, but the others have different goals and different priorities. They are capable of anger over this situation; I am not. To them, it's a matter of life and death while to me, it's a matter of inconvenience.

I would like to get home. Sometimes the best path is the one of least resistance.

[foo_bar]

Connor...

[he weighs this.]

I know your program is particular. But what if I said that part of it could help me with something?

[he flicks his eyes up at him]

And... maybe help save people.

[preconstruction]

[ it's true that his mission is stopping the deviants; but that was in the name of saving people. of keeping humans safe. and wasn't that true no matter where he was? wouldn't saving people give him something better to do? especially since cyberlife had likely already replaced him. why not agree to do this? why not save people?

connor seems to perk up at the suggestion. but in way he's trying to keep it lowkey. ]

Do you mean actually save them, or just a repeat of what happened here before?

[foo_bar]

Vivienne was a really brilliant engineer. Part of what she worked on is still being used by Oswald, and he's somehow improving on it.

My skillset is... different.

But I have a feeling, the robots she created are going to be central to everything again.

[preconstruction]

I thought you said androids didn't exist.

[ only AI, isn't that what he'd said? at least in front of everyone. but then again, it's like han had said, you never knew who you could trust. ]

So Vivienne created androids, and you think I might be able to use my skills to, what? Keep Hale from using the androids against the others?

[foo_bar]

I wouldn't call her creations andriods in the way you are. I don't think they have any actual AI in them, and they definitely wouldn't pass the Turing Test.

[he pauses.]

But fair enough.

I want to disable them, without letting Oswald know who did it. Him thinking I'm cute is only going to go so far.

[preconstruction]

That won't be difficult, if we can find them.

[ aren't you glad he's a machine who doesn't care about "his own kind"? ]

But you didn't answer my question about the deaths - not directly anyways. Is your goal to stop the students from killing one another?

[foo_bar]

Yes.

[he starts tapping his finger nervously against the desk.]

Vivienne wanted to as well, but acting openly got her killed. And I don't know what else I'm being lied to about.

[preconstruction]

[ mmmmmm ]

It's hard having to carry secrets like that, alone.

[foo_bar]

[he pauses for a moment, and then keeps tapping]

I can get access to the robots I think. But I need to make sure first.

After...

[tap tap tap, pause.]

Maybe I brought this up too soon.

[preconstruction]

After what?

[ his voice is gentle, trying not to prod but offering confidence. ]

I was created to stop androids that would harm humans. You can trust me.

[foo_bar]

I don't know if it's going to work.

[he chews the inside of his cheek for a moment.]

Give me a week. To test what I'm trying to do.

[preconstruction]

[ he wants to touch him; a comforting gesture to reassure him since he can see he's so nervous. but there's too much space between them, so he puts his hand on the desk, and lets his skin recede. it is an offering; a vulnerability of his own (he rarely shows his plastic to anyone; not even hank) in exchange for the vulnerability he wants from han. an offering to touch, if that's what the other man wants to do. ]

What is it that you're going to attempt?

[foo_bar]

[he glances at his hand, knowing that that is... so close. and then he shifts his hand closer to Connor's, responding to that sign of comfort.

He could definitely use some right now.]

I'm... going to crash them. Overload them, whatever it takes.

[preconstruction]

[ for a moment, a brief, awful moment, he remembers what he'd felt when he'd interfaced with megumi. that horrible sense of fear. the emotion he wasn't supposed to have. it is like the cat in the box. he is two things at once that cannot both be true. he is a machine designed to find machines that have been compromised and if necessary to destroy them. he is an android that felt sympathy for another android. when they open the box, will he still be alright with that idea? with the idea that han wants to overload the other robots? or will he have learned to be something he is not? ]

Why does that scare you?

[ funny, how desperately he wants to ask himself the same thing. ]

[foo_bar]

[he exhales.]

Because if it goes wrong, it will really go wrong.

[and then finally, he reaches out and touches his hand, glancing in the distance.]

This wasn't supposed to happen.

[preconstruction]

Do you think he'll kill you, too?

[ connor takes han's hand in his own, rubbing his thumb along his skin reassuringly. ]

Earlier you said -- you wanted to do this without Hale knowing. Why act recklessly now, if we could work on it together?

[foo_bar]

I know he will. Oswald's made his capacity for murder very clear.

[which, he knows is a lame answer. But also, he doesn't know what else to say. At least, not yet. But also, his eyes get drawn to Connor's.]

And that's just it-- before I throw anything else at any of you, I want to make sure we can get away with it. That's all.

[he purses his lips, and leans in closer.]

This is... extremely fucked up.

[preconstruction]

I'm not afraid.

[ not of working with him. not of dying. not of their proximity now and the way han gets closer to him. ]

But I can't be effective if you don't talk to me.

[foo_bar]

[there's silence there, at least at that last part. He's so close, so close to saying it all, and he leans in closer.]

Connor, I promise... It's going to all come out.

[Connor may not be human, but Han is. he so very much is. And his free hand reaches to his shoulder, fingers tangling in the fabric, pulling him closer.]

Just. Trust me on this, alright?

[preconstruction]

[ he can feel it; he's so fucking close but he also knows he can't push him too far or he'll lose him. it's a balancing act. it always is. just like it was with daniel, just like it was with carlos ortiz's stupidly unnamed android. ]

I want to trust you.

[ he lets himself be pulled, he leans forward and does what he knows han wants and kisses him on the lips. these gestures, these things -- they're as mechanical as he is, he doesn't have to have feelings for this man to do these things. (or have feelings at all, obviously) but. ]

Trust works best when it's mutual.